Year of Discovery (Week 17: Serving Others and Feminine Gods)
This last week, I said goodbye to Kenya, my wonderful home for the last 7-and-a-half years. At the start of the year, I felt a strong pull to move and jolt myself into new beginnings. Ultimately through a string of events, I was grateful to have more time in Kenya, live in a new neighborhood to see Nairobi from a different perspective, and share quality time with friends in my favorite places. As I look back, I’ve lived my entire 20s in Kenya, and within that, experienced many chapters and seasons, friendships, incredible growth, and intense highs and lows. I’m leaving with a wisdom that’s contributing to growing self-acceptance, kindness of thoughts, beliefs, and words, and a letting go of previous shackling beliefs. Moringa and my community in Kenya forced me to grapple with my inner shadows, encouraged a brighter light, sparked my curiosity in numerous ways, and invigorated energy in myself that I never felt before.
The question ‘if you had one more day left to live, what would you do?’ came to mind during my last week in Kenya. Each day as I spent time with people, I was most grateful for the small and mundane and I was happy that I could be present for those I love in my life. When time is limited, the feeling of nostalgia can point to what matters most.
This week, I’m reflecting on serving others and feminine gods.
The Importance of Serving Others
A theme that’s come up in some of my reflections and readings is how important it is to integrate serving others into our lives and work.
As an example, take brothers Bob, Michael and Greg. Bob makes decisions thinking of himself, Michael makes decisions thinking of his family and Greg makes decisions thinking of the greater communities and the world he’s part of.
One day, the brothers’ mother Lydia asks them simply: ‘can one of you help me set up the printer? It’s not working.’
Bob looks at his schedule and notices that he’s swamped with work and his calendar is already packed with activities he wants to do. He quickly messages his mother back: ‘You can find it on Google’.
Michael looks at his schedule and it’s also packed. He decides that ultimately, everything he does is for his family, so he decides to cancel a meeting to quickly set up the printer for his mom within that hour.
Greg notices that his mother often asks for IT support and senses how insecure she feels in a world that’s becoming more technologically focused. He’s noticed that the parents of his friends also have similar struggles and after seeing that Michael would help their mother with the printer setup, Greg decides to take some time in his day to prepare materials for a workshop he would take his parents and their peers through over the weekend so they feel more empowered to take on these challenges themselves.
There are times I’ve been a Bob, other times when I’ve been a Michael, and other times when I’m a Greg. I strive to be more like a Greg (who focuses on serving others in a broader way) because those who are more predominantly a Greg:
- engage more in creativity through a longer-term view
- create a lasting impact as they meet people where they’re at
- build in inherent patience and kindness in their day-to-day lives
- are more connected with others, which leads to higher levels of happiness and
- have more resilience when challenges arise.
Numerous scientific studies have shown that happiness is inextricably linked to having strong social ties and contributing to something bigger than ourselves— the greater good. So doing more for others actually makes us happier as people.
Serving others also make us more resilient. When I face challenges purely for myself, I find I have a shorter fuse (and feel more doubt) than when I’m overcoming obstacles with others in mind. Solving for others also creates a deeper sense of purpose and interconnectedness that outlives the bumps in the road, which may feel insurmountable otherwise.
I’m sure we know the Bobs, Michaels and Gregs in our lives. Question is: which one do you want to be more of?
As I’ve engaged on a number of ideas in the last few months, I’ve noticed that the ones that have a heavier emphasis on the purely commercial side of the commercial-to-impact spectrum haven’t felt as motivating to me. There’s something about creating financial gains for myself through niche opportunities to make another person’s life more convenient that doesn’t resonate. Rather, thinking about how my day-to-day work impacts the broader world creates a stronger, more lasting will to make difficult decisions and take unusual pathways.
Feminine Gods
I attended a friend’s wedding last weekend. The Jewish ceremony was beautiful and intentional: breaking the norms of pure tradition and instead, blended tradition with new elements. After a series of prayers, the couple asked their relatives and close friends for blessings on different themes: community, wisdom, love, friendship, etc. And before the traditional breaking of the glass to formalize the marriage, an explanation was given about the Shekhinah, the feminine version or side of the Jewish god.
“Shekhinah currently exists in many forms: she is another name for God, feminine, relational, experiential; she is a Goddess and the singular image that is sufficiently adaptable for a diverse range of postmodern feminist interpreters.” — How Shekhinah Became the God(dess) of Jewish Feminism
In a world where feminine energy is seen as increasingly powerful to draw on, I was curious about the different interpretations of Shekhinah and the feminine gods in various religions.
In Christianity, Skekhinah is similar to that in the Gospel of Matthew 18:20: “Where two or three are gathered together in my name there am I in their midst.” Some Christian theologians have connected the concept of shekhinah to the Greek term parousia, “presence” or “arrival,” which is used in the New Testament in a similar way for “divine presence”.
In Islam, the similar Sakīnah means “tranquility”, “peace”, “calm”, from the Arabic root sakana: “to be quiet”, “to abate”, “to dwell”. In Islam, Sakīnah “designates a special peace”, the “Peace of God”. Although related to Hebrew shekhinah, the spiritual state is not an “indwelling of the Divine Presence”. The ordinary Arabic use of the word’s root is “the sense of abiding or dwelling in a place”. Associated with piety and moments of divine inspiration, sakinah in Islamic mysticism signifies an interior spiritual illumination.
In Buddhism, there are many different forms of feminine energy, including dakini and Tara. The dakini is a manifestation of liberating energy in female form and is a messenger of emptiness, appearing in dreams to guide the meditator. The dakini is a force of truth: wherever we cling, she cuts; whatever we think we can hide, she reveals. In Buddhist cultures, the most well known of the many forms of the sacred feminine is known as Tara. She is considered to be the mother of all Buddhas — a deity of love, compassion, nurturance, and longevity.
Across the board, feminine energy is depicted as a spiritual wisdom that results in tranquility, peace and calm. In a world that’s chaotic, full of distractions and with systems/values that lead to higher rates of depression and anxiety, drawing from the feminine energy inside of each of us (according to religious meaning) can allow for the quiet and stillness we all need to rejuvinate our souls.
What are ways in which you can draw more from the wisdom of feminine energy?
What I’m listening to this week: A Story About a DIY Repartions Effort in Vermont
